What is it about having a kid free night out that makes you go slightly crazy when it comes to consuming alcohol?
Now date nights are important I get that. On a day to day basis you're so wrapped up in the kids and just getting through the day without any major incidents that you become more like flat mates. Most evenings are spent sitting on the sofa pausing live TV as you go up and down the stairs dealing with children until you eventually give up on the TV programme and go to bed having had no evening (again).
We were very lucky at the weekend to have 24 hours without kids and let me tell you, ALOT of preening went in to it. My husband went on a date with a new woman and this woman actually shaved her legs, plucked her mole hair and even wore makeup - I know, shocking!
"We need to pace ourselves” we said to each other on the train, "we haven’t been out drinking for ages”, we nod in agreement, "we’re in our forties we can’t do it like we used to......."
Four hours in and I’m dancing in a pub with a glass of prosecco in one hand and a rose spritzer in the other. In my head I’m spritely 21 year old but in reality I’m a middle aged woman who should’ve gone home ages ago. And when I say dancing that's not really true as it turns out since I’ve hit my 40’s I suddenly can’t dance. Nothing coordinates! How the hell did that happen? I’ve gone from being a hard core raver in my youth to doing the side step Nanna dance!
Now before you start thinking we completely neglected the girls we did actually put in a phone call to the in-laws to check they were ok, and when we knew all was good (and they weren’t in A&E) we ordered another bottle and that’s when it started to get a bit messy.
Being free of responsibility fuelled our thirst and we drank way more than we should of. It was official we were 'Out Out.' At that moment in time we weren’t thinking about the fact we'd still have to look after the kids the next day, we weren’t thinking that our hangovers would last for a month and well quite frankly we weren't thinking about anything other than what cocktail we could order next. Unfortunately Disorderly Mum became Drunk and Disorderly Mum! At 8:30pm I was struggling and admitted defeat. It was time to throw in the towel and go home. Shameful!
If you read the advice columns in magazines they constantly highlight the importance of 'date nights' when you have kids and how they can make your relationship stronger. Spending time with each other is supposed to remind you why you fell in love with each other in the first place. It's a win win situation, you get to go out and have some fun and the old sparks return to your relationship. Brilliant!
Well they do if your wife doesn't spend the rest of the night with her head down the toilet......but don't you worry I'll learn from this and will apply my new found wisdom when we have our next date night. I will you know............absolutely..............well maybe 😩